“you’re only 18, you’ll regret that tattoo when you’re older” my mom says as she hands me college applications so i can decide on the career i’ll have for the rest of my life
Justin Bieber at his deposition saying he was “detrimental” to his own career when he really meant “instrumental”
Well at least he was telling the truth
I’m going to assume this has happened to anyone who’s ever cuddled anyone and has a penis.
Source (find the exact comic yourself; at least I linked you to the webpage)
no, no, dont do this, please, if you are cuddling w/ me your boner is like a compliment and i welcome you to grind that !@#$%^&* into the back of my legs
if we are spooning and there isn’t a boner pressed into my butt I will assume you don’t actually like me and get really upset
Bones next to the butt are nice
Butt bones are the best bones.
where the women of tumblr make me feel better about having a boner when cuddling
I’m laughing so hard
wanna know what a cow looks like washed and blow dried?
that is what a cow looks like washed and blow dried
FLUFFY MILK HORSE
fluffy milk horse
“If the answer is false, explain why”
today someone passed me a paper and i said “thank” and they said “did you just say thank” and then i realized dorothy we’re not on the internet anymore
So Skittles has these new “Dark Side” kind and I just
"The Other Side of the Rainbow"
I DUNNO MAN
DOESN’T REALLY SOUND LIKE A PLACE I WANNA GO
EVEN THE FLAVORS SOUND SCARY AND WIERDLY… IDK
AND LET’S NOT FORGET THAT DARKEST AND MOST DEPRAVED OF FRUITS
But blood orange.
i hope manners is the next cool trend
in 6 years its going to be the 20s again so we can bring back swing music and the aesthetics of that era but keep modern values who’s with me
As long as we don’t repeat the Hitler gaining control and shit part cuz I heard that was pretty lame.
but the titantic sank in 1912 and the costa concordia sank in 2012 and history is totally repeating itself
World War 1 began in july 1914…
my friends sister was telling me about how in highschool a guy tried to take a picture up her skirt as she was walking up stairs and she saw, grabbed his phone, broke it in half, and handed it back to him and said “you can tell your mom why your phones broken”
for a second I forgot about flip phones and I was like how in the holy hell did she rip a phone in half